Starkit's Prophecy: reviewed
by Jaywritesfanfics
Summary: Join me as I review this incredibly trolly trollfic, while pretty much wishing it would end at chapter one
1. Chapter 1

**Ok, guys! This is my first fanfiction! I am reviewing this terrible story, I own nothing but the writing in bold. The story is about a random cat called Starkit who happened to be part of a second-rate prophecy concerning tigers and spiky leaves.**

Chpater oen prouloge

 **The writer somehow managed to misspell one…..**  
The cats gathered around a pool. They all looked into it eagerly.

 **Wow! A pool! THE WORLD ENDS**

A dark shape appeared on the surface. A blue she cat looked up. Her eyes were bright.

 **A shadow appears and everybody throws a party, while a cat has some horrible eye malfunction**

"There is a prophecy!" She said. "out of the darkness, stars will come and get rid of the evil tiger and holly."

 **THE HOLLY IS GOING TO GET US! AHHHHH!**

"Its about StarKit!"

 **How on earth did you know?!**

A white tom said. "Shes going to save the forest," He looked at a gold tom by BlueStar. "she has powers nobody dreamed of." Said the gold tom. "Should we tell JayFeather?" He asked. "Yes." Said BlueStar. "he needs to know."

 **Nah, we shouldn't tell the only cat responsible for the prophecies and omens of his clan**

She walked away from the pool to tell JayFeather about the prophcy.

 **HI! Jayfeather! I saw a shadow in a pool, and now we have problems!**  
 _ **  
did u like it? plz tell me in urm review!**_

 **Yes if you ignore the randomness, lack of sense, and spelling mistakes**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two**

 **Hi! Here's for chapter two!**

Chapter to the rose of a Heroin

 **Um, wrong spelling of heroine buddy** ** _  
ok jazzie-kun pleas dont get mad at me cause your not in it yet. You'l apear soon dont worry._**

 **I feel so, so, sorry for her** ** _  
_**  
StarKit wock up and sunlit was in the branches. She closed her eyes againstill tired.

 **Oh no, the branches have trapped Sunlit inside themselves! NOOOOO!**

Butter mom wouldn't let her sleep not today.

 **Your mum is literally a block of butter. Could explain her smooth, beautiful, golden fur and the soft, fluffy quality to it…. Ah….. sorry, having buttery dreams.**

"Sweety its time to get up" said Dawnsparkle; her eys shinning. "Today is important today."

 **Today is so important you have to repeat it over and over again.**

"What is it Mom" said StarKit awake right away. Then the she cat rememembered what today was.

 **She remememememememebered that there are 4 memes in that word**

"Ohmigosh its my serimony today!' she squelled excercisedly. Today was the day she was an apprentice!

 **OMIGOSSS IMMA GONNA BE AN APWENTIS OMIGOOOSE**

She flicked outside not even waiting for her Mom.

 **She flicked herself outside. With a godly slingshot.**

But her Mom cot up to her quick.

 **Well, being an inanimate object limits your transport options to flying beds.**

"Sweety you know the clans don't except cat slike use sometimes." She said.

 **Probably because you're a talking block of butter on a flying bed.**

StarKit glared. She didn't lake beig told that. Just because her Mom was a usedto be Shadowclan cat and her dad was jayFeather the medicine Cat didn"t mean she ws different!

 **Yes it does, your death broke the law. You are illegal.**

"StarPaw come here." Said FireStar from the leg. He jumped down.

 **Tigerstar sat on a pile of bones, but Firestar went one step better with an amputated leg on a stick. Must be quite uncomfortable, but the guy doesn't give a thing for anything.**

"StarKit it s tome for you to become an apentice: he said. "Your a strong brave cat and because of that I will mentor with you."

 **Um, she is only a kit?! One who has done nothing but stare at cats trapped inside trees?!**

Ever body gasped. StarKit did too. Se herd hear mother say "Wow!".

 **Her mother herded a flock of "wow!"s.**

Firehert liked her shoulder.

 **He is such a bad leader he can't even keep his name.**

He whispered in her ear "youll be the best their ever was StarPaw I know ti."

 **Um, Firestar? You're getting really creepy here, comparing her to tea. Or maybe she is actually a teabag.**

Surpised she walked away when they were done howling for her.

 **Suddenly, they're dogs.**

/ Then she went ofer to JayFeathern and DawnSparkle who were very prod.

 **They were very tempted to prod your buttery teabag fur for existing.**

"Daughetr where very happy but he have to say something said Jayfeather his chest puffed ouit. "You see there is this prophcy Starcaln gave me it said that out of the darkness, stars will come and get rid of the evil tiger and holly."

 **Jayfeather has chesty puffed ouits. Sounds dangerous.**

StarPaw gasped. What does it mean?

 **How on earth do you not know?! I think inanimate objects' offspring have limited brain power.**  
 ** _  
lol I update fast dont i. REVEIW or ill hit over the head with a frying pan! XDD jk_**

 **LOOK OUT! SHE'S GOT A FRYING PAN! AHHHHGGRRRRRHH!**

 **Hope you enjoyed this chapter, review or I'll hit you over the head with a spatula! XD**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter three**

 **Another chapter! Woah!**

Chapter three the Battle 4 the caln

 **The caln is in danger!**  
 ** _thx jazzie-kun 4 th good review! and stop flmaing the stroy!1 i bet u cant right such a good story!1!1_**

 **No we certainly couldn't. *note the sarcasm***

StarPaw walkd over too the appentice's den. Insid she saw her sister's FlamePaw and lakePaw

 **She had sisters?! Oh, no, more problematic mary-sues.**

and hr frend JazzPaw (a.n: jazzie-kin ur my bff!) waz slepping on the mos.

 **I hope when Jazzpaw stops slipping on moss, she is still able to walk amidst the randomness.**

"JazzPaw get up." She cried. JazzPaw opend her brlliaint blu eyes and looked at hr.

 **Starkit has renamed herself hr. Brilliant.**

"Do yo want 2 go on pattrol wit me?" she asked.

 **I seriously doubt it.**

"Sure!" Said JazzPaw getten up from the moss. They leavt and went two the entrnse too camp.

 **The entrance was too camp, we need to call the ghostbusters!**

But then, a cat came in thru the entrnce! It was BlackStar!1!11

 **Blackstar: Hi guys! I was wondering if you would like some free waffles!**

"Shadowclan are attaking!" She yelled.

 **You mean Blackstar.**

All the cats came out from there dens. She jumped on a cat and clawd him and he ran of.

 **…** **.logical**

"Good job StarPaw!" FireStar called, "The last cat i new that culd fiht lik that was SandStrom. Your a good fihter!"

 **Whoah. You just compared your great-granddaughter with your mate. Creepy.**

StarPaw was happy. She wus a good fihgter! Maybey this was wat the prophcy meant.

 **No, the prophecy meant you tear the waffle-dealers fur off.**  
 ** _  
thnkx and ples no more flams_**

 **Goodbye, and good riddance.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter four**

Chapter Three The Traning Under The Star

 **I think you meant four buddy**

 ** _OMGOSH GUkys im so sorry but SOMEONE glares at rainy days_**

 **Where I live, if rain was a man the moment he stepped out of his house he would have rotten fruit thrown at him.**

 ** _FLAMED ME AND I GOT REALLY HURT. OKKAY IF you dont LIKE thestor y you dont have to readit u know._**

 **Yeah, but I have nothing else to do.**

Chapter Three The Traning Under The Stars

 **Again?!**

Shadowclan run from the camp.

 **You mean Blackstar. Poor Blackstar.**

StarPaw smiled. Shed one! Noone cod hurt her family now .

 **Who would want to hurt a blind medicine cat and a block of butter?!**

StarPaw!" said FireStar. "Its time we train!" I want to show you how to fight!"

 **Finally.**

"Ok." Sad StarPaw happl;y. "but yo just saw I culd fight, write?" "Well, ya." said FireStar. "But I wnted tol see if that was all you new."

 **I could barely read that.**

"Ok." They went to the frost togather

 **That sounds cold.**

and the other cats cleaned jp the bodies.

 **Blackstar must have superpowers as only one cat attacked.**

"Ok StarPaw" said Firestar one they got their. "We'll start with how to dog."

 **Soon you'll be howling like the clan at Starpaw's apprentice ceremony.**

"Cmon thas too easy!" yelled StarPaw. Shed just beat BlackStar she was ready for anything!

 **For somebody like you, maybe.**

"ok Ok" mewled FiresTar, lets learn how to claw an oponit.

 **Poor oponit. I wonder what an oponit is.**

"Ya." Yowled Starkit. She jumped at FireStar not Giving hiM time to attakc.

 **YOU BROKE THE RULES OF POLITENESS**

"She hit his side he didn't move he was to surprise.d she clawed him and he started bledding. "wow StarPaw" he said ".Your doing awesome."

 **She just tried to kill you.**

"Really?" gaped StarPaw. She didn't think she was doing that god was she relly special like the porphesy meowed?

 **If that wasn't good, I don't know what is.**

"Yes StarPaw." Snarled Firestar. "I couldnteven get away in fast enough. Only scourg was did that before.,"

 **Whoah, calm down buddy.**

"OMGOSH REALLY?" asked StarPaw. Scourg?1? THE SCOURG?

 **Yes it's Scourge, but of course that's too much for your buttery teabag mary-sue brain to handle.**

She dherad so muchj about him he was really evil and killed alot of cats.

 **He killed about three I think? WAY less than Firestar.**

"I'M LIKE SCOURG? "I didnt mean it like that" FirePaw sad fastly. "I ment you wer a good fighter. Its really cool."

 **uhmmmmmmm**

At that minute he thought to himself 'Starpaws so kawaii look at her eys and her fur.

 **OH NO NOT THE KAWAII JUST STOP NO GOSH.**

"Oh ok thanks." They trained floor awhile later StarPaw beat FireStar 8 times once she let him win to make him fel bettar and b y the last one she was alittle tired.

 **She beat him 8 times in a row, and she was literally only born a few months ago.**

"Hey FireStar can we hunt now." Said StarPaw. "im kinda hungry."

 **Of course you are, you haven't eaten since the beginning of the story.**

"Oh we'll if you want." Firestar was disappointed he and; starPaw had been having so much fun.

 **Firestar is getting really creepy.**

So they went huntng, StarPaw messed up a couple times but FireStar said it was okaysince it was only her second time (she'd had her first time when she was a littlekit and she and FireStar had snuck out together that's why he chose her as his apprentice_.

 **Yep, still creepy. Let's rename him Firestalker.**

Later that night StarPaw locked up at the stars. She and Firestar had'd so much fun this day. Theyd brung back enough food for the hole clan.

 **Shouldn't you be sad that Firestalker buried the clan in a giant hole?!**

Locking upn at the stars she turned to her best friend, JazzPaw, and said, "Do you think well ever be up there."

 **No way, you'll spend the rest of eternity in hell.**

"Ya totally." Said JazzPaww. "I mean youll be l,eader and I'll be depudy one day well have too!"

 **The clan will mourn that day, though being buried in a hole it will be quite hard to hear the naming ceremony.**

"Ya." Said StarPaw smiling she loved JazzPaw NOT IN THAT WAY U SICKOS!)

 **Yay! Jazzpaw x Starpaw for life!**

they were best friends. She loked up at the stars again and smiled and fell asleep wit the Starcaln voices whisper in her head.

 **How do you sleep when dead cats whisper in your buttery teabag fur.**

 ** _REVIEW R MY LIFE_**

 ** _(lol u like it Jazzy I mead you as kawai as I could(_**

 **No. No. JUst no.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter five**

Chapter For StarPaws decids

 **Chapter for Starpaw the sids. Wow.**

 ** _flamrs ur all satanits!11 anyon who dosent like the stro is a staneist cause StarGIPaw has such a strng conecton with sTarcaln and thats why you dot like it, its cause u do ntlik JEZUS!_**

 **Ok, I think I will have to be as light as possible from now on due to religious reasons, but I will continue to review in the best way possible. Also, I'm pretty sure The Lord doesn't go around punching people who don't like your terrible concoction.**

"StarPaw wok up its tim 4 parole."

 **WHUT**

StarPaw opnd hr brite reinbow eys and locked arund.

 **She grabbed a padlock and waved it around.**

"Omigosh who wus tha!1!1"Sshe yellow.

 **She's YELLOW?!**

"Its me GrayStipe" GrayStrip wisperd in her er. StarPaw gottedup.

 **Graystrip whispered into Starpaw's ear and she got a duck.**

"Omigosh Graystip what do u want!1

 **He wants to kill you for illegally being born and messing up everybody's lives.**

she yelped GrayStrpe locked at hr.

 **yet more padlocks.**

"Wll u be my mat" hE ESked.

 **Yes, finally Graystripe is going to skin her buttery teabag fur and use it as a luxury mat to put all the amputated limbs Firestar sits on.**

"OMigosh grayStripe thats so nic!" StarKit scremed. "but FireStar alredy esked me."

 **It's so nice he wants to turn you into a mat?!**

"wel then hes jst an idot."

 **That was harsh, but I'm pretty sure Firestalker has no life anyway.**

"StarPaw wok up its tim 4 parole."

 **The chapter is repeating over and over. This is some kind of nightmare.**

StarPaw opnd hr brite reinbow eys and locked arund.

"Omigosh who wus tha!1!1"Sshe yellow.

"Its me GrayStipe" GrayStrip wisperd in her er. StarPaw gottedup.

"Omigosh Graystip what do u want!1 she yelped GrayStrpe locked at hr. "Wll u be my mat" hE ESked.

"OMigosh grayStripe thats so nic!" StarKit scremed. "but FireStar alredy esked me."

"wel then hes jst an idot."

y do u say tha?" yellED STARPaw GayStrip

 **Oh gosh no.** ** _Gaystrip_** **, seriously?!**

locked at hr meanly. "i dont lik him" sqeakd GrayStripe he locked arund fastly. "hes a mean cat!

 **Of course he's mean, he zapped the entire clan into a hole.**

"OMIGOSH U MEAN LIKE SCOURG?" STARPAW SHOCKED.

 **No, Scourge has swag.**

"No ur much prtter then sourg" said Graystripe he licked her on the head I want u to be my mat." he yeleled.

 **He yelelelelelleld st the prtty cat.**

"Well mabey. but what would FireStar say?" she wispereed.

 **He would throw his collection of amputated limbs at you, then sulk for 75 years and die of pneumonia while sipping tea.**

GrayStripe locked around agan. "I dont think he wuld mind." said GraStri;e

 **I'm pretty sure he would.**  
"OMIGOSH SUR THAN!" StarPaww yelleded happly.

 **Why is everybody yellleeelling happly?!**

"Wat ar uo ta;kin abut" said FireHert he was walkin up. He locked angrily.

 **The angry padlock attack.**

"oh uhhhh nuthin FireStar go back to sleep!" mwled StarPaw hoppin he would leaf so she culd be alon with grayStripe.

 **Starpaw wants her great-grandfather to turn into a leaf.**

"Yah FireStra theres nithing to wory about!" cherrid GrayStrpe but Firestar didn't leave insted he said i thought I herd you asking her to be our mate."

 **OUR?! No way, she'll use her abnormal superpowers to zap you into oblivion before you even have time to die of pneumonia.**

"oh uh yeh. yELLED STARPaw but he didn;t leaf instead he jumped on GrayStripe!1!11

 **Poor Gaystrip.**

"I Want to be wit her!" said FireHart attakin GraySriep.

"No I do!" shouted.

 **Life is not a wish-granting factory – some random guy who kicked the bucket in a book I can never remember the name of.**

"guysys stop fihting you can BOTH be my mats! StarPaw wispered apply like seCert."

 **There needs to be a creepypasta of this.**

"No we can;t do that their can only be 1!11 Howled Firestar. "Otterwies youll chet on us."

 **THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE**

"So StarGleam, who will u pik?" giggled GayStipe.

 **I would prefer it if she chose Graystripe because they aren't related.**


End file.
